Tuesday, December 13, 2005

The Lengths I Will Go To Annoy My Mother

After I dropped out of college the first time, I decided to move to Italy.
Rome, Italy to be exact.

At first I got completely grossed out by the women not shaving their underarms. After a few months I had gotten quite used to it.

I later tired of not being able to leave the apartment. I would run through the streets trying to exscape the Italian boys chasing me. They would stalk me and follow me wherever I went.

A few months of that and I decided it was time to go home.

When I got home, I thought it would be fun to gross out the Americans so I stopped shaving my underarms.

Hey, if the Italian women could do it, so could I!

It didn't last very long, but it was so much fun to lift my arms in front of my mother. She would scream and chase me around the house with a razor. I would laugh and run and make her embarassed in front of her friends. A fate worse than death for my Mother.

Winter time came, and I was grossing myself out. It was time to tame the beast that was my underarms.

I never did find another way to get under my Mothers skin that was so effective. It sure was fun while it lasted.


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